Abrasion - To
wear down the skin by using friction. Materials and toys such as
sandpaper, steel wool, rough cloth, and bottlebrushes are often
used. This increases sensitivity while giving both pleasure and
Preference for hairless genitals
- Sexual attraction to men who are circumcised.
Adult Babies -
Age play wherein the submissive is the baby. This may include
diapering, powdering, wearing a pacifier, sleeping in a crib, etc.
Rarely taken to a 24/7 extreme.
Adult Toy Chest
– A place where one keeps their sex toys. A sex toy box.
Age Play - play
that involves assuming the role of someone of a different age. Most
commonly, one of the adults takes on the younger role, usually in
the submissive capacity.
Sexual arousal from experiencing pain
Reaching orgasm from watching other people in sexual activities.
– A type of nipple clamp with tips that have teeth resembling an
alligators mouth. Most clamps of this style come with removable
rubber tips and have adjustment screws to limit how far they can
- High heel fetish
Anal Dildo – A
dildo that is intended to be used with the anus as the receptor.
- Sex using the anus as the receptor.
- Sexual arousal from female cross dressers
Ankle Cuffs -
Attachable cuffs, generally made of leather, that enable a Dom to
immobilize his submissive's legs
- Any device including ankle cuffs that immobilize a submissiveness
- Training where the Dominant has his submissive play the part of an
animal, such as horses and dogs. The most common is "puppy play".
- see breath control
Professional sterilization device for piercing equipment.
Asphyxiation - see breath control
- Sexual arousal from cross-dressing
B&D, B/D, B/d -
Bondage and Discipline. Although they go together in this
phrase, they are not inextricably linked. Bondage means restraining
someone in a helpless position (Such as being tied up.) Discipline
is training a person to behave in a certain way. They tend to go
together because Dominants tend to do both to their submissive.
BDSM - A
popular acronym for activities inclusive of (but not limited to)
Bondage, Domination/Discipline Submission/Sadism & Masochism. Also
called WIITWD, an acronym for "What It Is That We Do." Both mean
this type of alternative lifestyle. Sometimes the word "Bondage" has
the same broad range meaning when used in a descriptive context.
BDSM Toy Box –
A place where one keeps their BDSM gear or play equipment.
expression for blowjob (fellatio); ditto in the BDSM lifestyle.
Ball Gag - A
device with a rubber ball and straps, which secures the ball in the
bottom's mouth to stifle screams.
Ball Stretching - The practice of
stretching the scrotal sack so that it hangs lower using weights or
other devices to pull on it above the testicles. As the sack is
pulled, the testicles are squeezed leading to discomfort and
Ball Torture -
Causing pain to the male testicles, also included in CBT or cock and
Ball Toys -
Toys used for playing with the scrotum - such as weights, straps,
Ball Weights -
Weights used to stretch the scrotum. See Ball Stretching
– Extremely high heeled boots that require you to stand on the ends
of your toes rather than the sole of your foot. Usually they have
heels that are 8-9 inches and require considerable training and
ability to walk in without assistance. Sometime also referred to as
Barbell - A
straight piece of metal used in piercing, as opposed to a ring.
Sexual arousal from kissing
Foot torture involving the soles of the feet.
General term for such BDSM activities such as flogging caning,
spanking, strapping, etc.
Sexual arousal from use of needles
Belt - A
leather strap used for striking the buttocks.
- Depilation (hair removal) using both electrolysis and thermolysis.
Blindfold - By
blocking out sight - a common technique in SM scene - the bottom
feels more vulnerable and increases the release of endorphins, thus
contributing to the excitement in the scene.
Blood sports -
A group of techniques in which the submissive's skin is broken and
blood is allowed to escape. Such as cutting, using needles, etc. See
Fellatio, head, sucking cock.
Body Art -
Artful body modification including: piercing, tattoos and brandings.
- Making alterations to the appearance of the body. Includes, but is
not limited to, tattoos, piercings, brandings, scarification.
Body Shaving -
Removal of hair with a razor. Female and male submissives commonly shave
their pubic hair clean.
Making a submissive physically helpless and to a great extent
immobilized. Techniques include rope ties, handcuffs, leather cuffs,
stocks and mummification.
Licking and cleaning of a Dominant's boots by a submissive is a
common show of submission. Can also be a fetish.
Bottom - A
Boy - Term for
male submissive (also spelled "boi")
Boy Toy – A
male who is submissive to a dominant. Dominant can be either male or
Making a permanent or semi-permanent scar on the skin by burning it
with a heated metal object. Usually used by a Master to "mark" his
slave as his property.
Brat - Term for
a sub who tries to get the attention of a Dom/me by "acting up."
- Tying up the female breasts with rope.
Breast Press -
A device that squeezes the breasts.
- another type of "edgeplay" whereby the submissive's breath is
stopped for a short period of time to increase pleasurable
sensations. Also called asphyxiaphilia, autoerotic asphyxiation,
breath games, breathplay and hypoxyphilia. Very Dangerous.
Bukake - Sexual
scene where many men masturbate on and give a "semen bath" to a
Bullwhip - A
long, heavy leather whip usually longer than 4 feet.
- A wood board where a male's scrotum can be nailed or pinned onto.
Buttplug - a "sextoy"
shaped to fit into and stay inside the rectum.
– Usually a leather harness that prevents a buttplug from being
removed either intentional or accidentally from the rectum.
Cage - A
bondage practice, wherein the submissive is kept inside a cage. They
can be so small as to restrict motion or large enough for two or
Candle - A
source of hot wax, which is dripped onto the bottom's body in BDSM
Caning - Using
a rattan cane (although they are made of many other substances) on a
Submissive. Usually more severe than a flogging.
Cat - An old
school expression for an old school BDSM tool of discipline - the
"cat o nine tails".
Cat O Nine Tails
– a whip that has exactly 9 strands. Some have a knot at the end for
increased sensation or sting.
Flexible tube used in medicine; in BDSM catheters designed for the
bladder, often utilized in 'control' scenes.
- Sexual arousal from inserting a catheters
CBT - Cock and Ball
Torture - Causing pain to the male genital area; usually in
controlled, consensual BDSM scenes.
Chastity Belt -
A device used to keep the submissive chaste when the Dominant is
away. Comes in both male and female models.
Chains - Multi-use metal links; used to restrain, restrict
movement and/or tie up a submissive.
masturbating while defecating
The cutting away of some or the entire foreskin, in males. In the
female, circumcision usually refers to the removal of the clitoral
Clamp - Generic
term for any BDSM toy (even if garnered at a hardware store) that
can clamp some body part of a submissive.
Generic term for plastic wrap which is used in mummification scenes.
Clip - Generic
term for any BDSM toy (even if garnered at a hardware store) that
can clip some body part of a submissive.
- Surgical removal of the clitoris.
Tonguing the clitoris. Also called "eating" which is easier to
wooden or plastic clothespins, typically used to produce pain
sensation on the skin. Usually on nipples and genital areas.
Clover Nipple Clamps -
Type of adjustable nipple clamps that tightens as it is pulled. Also
known as Japanese Clover Nipple Clamps.
Submissive - A submissive who only obeys the easy stuff or only
when he/she feels like it.
Cock Cage - a CBT device that encase a penis shaft inside it.
Can be either a solid or web design.
Cock Cuff – a
chastity device that consists of a tube welded to a handcuff,
usually both made of stainless stelel. The penis is slide into the
tube and the handcuff closes behind the ball sack making removal all
but impossible without unlocking the handcuff. A very effective
Cock Ring -
Rubber or metal ring that slips round base of cock and balls;
supposed to increase duration of erection but also has D/s aspects
Cock Strap -
Leather or neoprene strap that wraps around the base of cock and
balls to help improve erection.
Cock Sucking -
see "fellatio" if you don't already know.
Cock Torture -
Cock and ball torture without the ball torture. Giving pain only to
the penis shaft.
Color Codes -
such as the hanky code of sexual preference.
Collar and Leash
- Worn by the bottom during this type of BDSM play. The Dominant
holds the leash and the bottom must follow and obey.
Condom - Latex
"rubber" that goes over the penis to prevent semen from entering a
vagina. Also known as "rain coat" and "gym cap."
Consent - To
give approval. The BDSM code of "safe, sane and consensual" or “SSC”
is the cornerstone of BDSM play. With consent being the most
Contract - A
written agreement between D/s partners outlining the extent of their
relationship. These contracts cannot be legally enforced, but they
are often used to define the relationship. See also Slave
Control - The
Dominant should have control in one form or another over his
submissive in any D/s relationship.
Sexual excitement derived from eating feces
Sexual excitement from dirty words
Gaining sexual pleasure from scat play.
- Retributive punishment using repetitive spankings and question and
reply to change a bottom's behavior.
Corset - Very
popular clothing item that cinches and narrows the waist and gives
the female an "hourglass" figure.
Crop - A type
of whip used in horseback riding, quite popular in BDSM scenes. It
stings and can mark a butt severely, but is easy to master and quite
reasonable in price.
Cross - see St. Andrew's Cross.
- Dressing in clothing worn by the opposite sex. Does not indicate
sexually preference in any way.
BDSM play wherein a submissive is tied to a cross.
Cuff - A metal
or leather bondage device that locks round a limb and can be used to
immobilize the sub's limbs.
Licking and sucking the cunt.
Cunt Torture -
Stimulation or pain inflicted on the female genitals.
Cupping - The
placing of suction devices on the skin to increase blood flow.
Typically these are used on the nipples and the genitalia.
Increasing the blood flow increase sensation as well.
Cutting the submissive's skin with a sterile knife. These can be
either temporary or permanent. Made permanent by putting sterile
foreign substances into them before they heal. Not for beginners.
DM - Acronym
for Dungeon Monitor. In a BDSM play party, they watch the scenes to
make sure house rules are followed and the play is safe.
DP - Double
D/s - Popular
abbreviation for Dominance and submission. A relationship between a
Top and bottom where one is Dominant and the other submissive. Can
be for a scene or can be a long-term relationship or anything in
between. (Also called Dom-sub, DS, D/S, D&S.)
Sexual arousal from seeing tears in the eyes of one's partner.
Something sadists sometimes find enjoyable or arousing.
Daddy - A role
taken on by some dominants; especially common in age play.
Removal of hair. Many Dominants require their submissive to shave
certain areas, their whole body or just their pubic hair.
Dildo - A
manufactured penis-shaped object.
Whipping, spanking, verbal orders, etc for the purpose of training a
Dittle Sound -
A straight urethral sound.
Role-play games involving treating the bottom as a dog. Similar to
Pony Training where the bottom is treated like a pony.
Dom - Short for
Dominant - A
Top. who controls a bottom, submissive, or slave.
Taking the Dominant role - controlling the bottom's behavior, it can
be role-play or in a D/s relationship.
Dominatrix - A
Domme; it implies being a professional.
Domme - A
female Dominant. Can also be used interchangeably with Mistress
- Simultaneous penetration of the ass and pussy.
- Injecting of a liquid, usually water, into the asshole or pussy,
usually for hygiene purposes prior to sex or ass play.
Duct Tape -
Also known as gaffer's tape; used in many BDSM scenes (such as
taping the submissive's mouth shut).
Dramatic term for a BDSM or Bondage playroom.
EMS Unit -
see Tens Unit
Sexual arousal from stripping in front of an audience
Ecdysiast - A
Technically, this refers to knife play. But it has come to mean
anything "on the edge." Or considered “Extreme” It can even include
fisting, asphyxia, play piercings, needle play, etc. One person's
edge can be another's norm so there are no hard and fast rules
defining what "edgeplay" is.
Edgeplayer - A
person who partakes in edgeplay.
- Using electricity for stimulation. Professionally made electrical
units are to be used - like the "tens" unit and the "violet wand."
Not for beginners.
Permanent electric hair removal.
-Another, more dramatic, term for electrical play.
Permanent removal of the male sex organs. Sometimes simulated
through the use of a chastity device or through a dominants
restrictions forbidding typical male behavior such a urinating while
Endorphin - A
chemical produced in the body that seems to be involved in
regulating the perception of pain. Endorphins give a "rush" similar
to adrenaline (which is released simultaneously) and it is
speculated that their release is the cause of the phenomenon known
Enema - A
thorough anal douche using a bag and tube.
Enema Play -
Using the enema as a BDSM device in play.
- Chastity play where the Dom controls a sub's sexual frequency and
ability to experience sexual pleasure, usually with a chastity belt
or other chastity device.
– A Bondage device that is very strict or terribly confining,
usually not something used on beginners.
Face Fucking -
another term for a blowjob. .
Fainting - A
temporary loss of consciousness. Caused by lack of oxygen to the
brain, can happen during extreme BDSM play - such as breath control,
long pain sessions, etc. Can be dangerous (brain damage) when caused
by breath control play.
Imbibing semen out of the vagina or anus
Giving head, a blow-job (BJ), going down on someone, being face
fucked: the act of sucking or licking a penis, or having a penis
inserted in the mouth.
Someone whose specialty is Fellatio.
Femdom - A
Female Domination - Being controlled or
lead by a female.
- An unusual obsession with something. Like a leather fetish, a
latex fetish or a shoe fetish. Fetishes are only limited by the
Fetish Attire -
Clothes that reflect the wearer's particular fetish, such as
leather, latex, rubber or high heels.
Domination – Controlling another’s financial matters or money.
Fire Play - The
use of fire in sexual play.
Fisting - also
called fist fucking and FF. Attempting to place the whole hand into
the rectum or vagina. Must be done with great care and sterility.
Can provide exceptional orgasms.
BDSM-related whipping, beating and spanking for erotic stimulation.
Flogger - a
multi-tailed leather implement.
using a "flogger" on a submissive.
- Type of catheter that can be inflated with sterile water.
Foot Worship -
A foot fetish where the submissive worships the Dominants feet,
usually in high heel shoes or boots.
Freeplay - BDSM
play where there is no Domination or submission.
Piercing the surface of the penis shaft.
- Continual stimulation and sucking of the female nipple can
sometimes produce milk. Also known as forced breast milking
Gaffer's Tape -
see Duct Tape.
Sexual attraction to statues
Gauge - System
of grading the thickness. The lower the number, the thicker the wire
Pain play involving the genitals. (See Ball Torture, Cock and Ball
Torture, Cunt Torture).
Preference for sex with the elderly
Go Down On -
Still another of the endless terms for fellatio.
- Urination play. Also called (duh) "piss play." And GS.
Gym Cap - Slang
- Person sexually aroused by a female impersonator
Piercing through the upper part of the scrotum.
Commonly used BDSM device to restrain the wrists.
Hanky Code -
Old guard leather community's color code of sexual preference.
Elaborate bondage device made with leather straps worn on the body
Arousal from being robbed
Licking someone's anus (also called rimming.)
Henna - A brown
dye made from the leaves of the henna plant. Used in temporary
High Heels -
Popular objects of foot fetishists, along with boots.
Hobble Skirt -
Very narrow skirt that restricts the wearer's ability to take
anything other than tiny steps.
Sexual arousal from hearing sermons
Hood - A head
covering, usually made of leather, that the Dominant wears to
increase the "fear factor" in a BDSM scene or a submissive is made
to wear to provide some degree of sensory deprivation.
Horse - In
bondage, it is a modification of a sawhorse over which a submissive
can be tied. Sometimes called a spanking bench.
Breath play wherein sexual pleasure is derived from limiting the
intake of oxygen. Usually accomplished by temporary choking. Very
Sexual arousal from exposing oneself to a medical doctor
Sexual arousal from statues of nude people
- Extreme form of bondage where no body parts can move, one example
is mummification. Not for beginners.
Role-play as a young child for sex play
closing off, obstructing or modifying, either permanently or
temporarily, the male or female genitalia so as to alter or prevent
the conduct of sexual intercourse.
John - A person
who patronizes prostitutes.
Nipple Clamps - Type of adjustable nipple clamps that tightens
as it is pulled. General preferred because they won't easily slip
Sexual arousal from stealing
Sexual arousal from giving or getting enemas
Knife Play - A
specific form of "edgeplay" where the Dominant uses a knife to
either cut or tease the submissive.
Knot - The
easiest way to fasten rope in bondage.
Sexual arousal from tickling
- Sexual arousal from forced dilation of the vagina
Sexual arousal from lactating breasts
Lash - A strike
from a whip, paddle, crop or flogger.
Latex Play -
Play which uses paint on latex.
Leather - One
of the most popular of fetish materials; many get excited by the
look and/or feel of leather clothing, boots, etc.
large handcuffs intended to be used to immobilize or restrict
movement of the ankles
Leg Irons -
Steel ankle cuffs. Patterned after British prisoner restraints. "Put
him in irons!"
Limit - The
point beyond which a submissive does not allow the Dominant to go.
It can be a "soft limit" which can change over time, or a "hard
limit" which is more or less written in stone. For example, a
submissive might say, "fisting is my hard limit." Or soft!
Piercing through the skin on the underside of the penis.
Lunge Whip -
Ma'am - Term of
respect for a female Dominant.
Master/slave. (Also, less popularly, MS, M&S or M-s)
- Sexual arousal from outsized genitals
Maid - Popular
role-play where the submissive dresses up - and acts like - a maid.
- Sexual arousal from pregnant women
Malacca - A
Maledom, male dom
- A male Dominant.
– BDSM play where a male is the one in control or who controls the
- Sexual arousal from female breasts
Manacle - Metal
Masochist - One
who gets pleasure from pain.
Dominant, controlling partner in a D/s relationship, where the
submissive partner is known as the slave.
Medical Scene -
BDSM scene involving medical scenarios.
Sexual arousal from women on their period
Mentor - A
teacher or advisor who often shows a "newbie" around the world of
BDSM and D/s. Mistress - Female analogue of Master.
- Sexual arousal from bondage
Female counterpart for Master, a female dominant.
Analogue of Daddy in BDSM play. Sometimes submissives call their
Used as a BDSM device for nipple torture. A severe and pain cheap
A unique kind of bondage scene in which the whole body is wrapped
tightly in a film - typically plastic wrap. (You never thought it
would be used for that, did you?). Not for beginners.
Nailing - BDSM
play where the scrotum or breasts are nailed to a board.
tube - Used in control scenes such as forced feeding.
Sexual arousal from nose sucking
Sex with a corpse
Sexual gratification from sex with the dead
Needle Play -
another "edgeplay" where sterilized needles are inserted through the
top layer of the skin (the epidermis). Most popularly it is done
underneath and around the female nipple and the breast. Not for
discussing hard and soft limits and related items of BDSM taste
before any play or relationship begins. It helps in defining Safe,
Sane and Consensual between the dominant and submissive.
Someone new to something such the BDSM play or lifestyle.
Nipple Clamps -
Devices that clamp onto the nipples. Weights can be attached to
stretch the nipples. Nipple Clamps often provide increased
stimulation which can involve pain and pleasure. See Also, Japanese
Clover Nipple Clamps, Alligator Nipple Clamps, Tweezer Nipple Clamps
Nipple Rings -
Jewelry that looks like small hoop earrings that are inserted
through pierced nipples. Another popular jewelry style for pierced
nipples is the barbell. There also non-permanent nipple rings which
stay attached by pinching the nipple.
- To cause pain to the nipples. Typically by using nipple clamps,
needles, mousetraps, pulling and twisting, etc.
Nipple Shield -
Decorative nipple jewelry the encircles or even covers the nipple.
- Usually weights suspended from either nipple clamps or from nipple
Novice - see
Sexual arousal from biting
A tooth fetish
Sexual arousal from snakes
Oral Sex - Sex
involving contact between mouth and any other sexual organ.
- A tube from mouth to stomach. Used in force feeding scenes. Not
- Sexual arousal from foul smells
OTK - "Over the
Knee" spanking were the subject is placed over the lap of the person
administering the spanking.
PA - see Prince
PE - see Power
Paddle - A flat
instrument used for spanking purposes; usually made of wood or some
other rigid material.
Common type of lock used in BDSM play. Use to secure bondage
restraints, securely fasten chain links together, as labia weights,
Pain - Pain
causes the release of endorphins that is thought causes the
submissive to go into subspace.
Pain Games -
BDSM play involving pain.
Pain Slut -
Popular expression for a submissive who loves pain. Also a masochist
- The point at which stimulation becomes pain.
BDSM activities encompassing all sexualities, heterosexual,
homosexual, trangender, etc.
Stretcher - A toy resembling a parachute from which weights can
be suspended in ball torture scenes.
Fetish for large penises. Something most women have.
- Piercing the body in order to insert jewelry that is intended
to be worn on at least a semi-permanent basis.
Piss Play - see
Water Sports, Golden Showers.
Play Piercing -
Piercing the body temporarily. All piercings are removed at the end
of the session.
See Foot Fetish
Pony Play -
Role-play scene where the submissive takes on the role of a pony.
Can be very elaborate.
- The dynamic whereby the Dominant is consensually given power over
the submissive, whether for just the scene or for a relationship.
Sometimes called Total Power Exchange or TPE.
Press Style Nipple Clamps - These are
nipple clamps that press the nipple between two pieces of metal
usually forced together by a thumb screw. The thumb screw allows
them to be squeezed tight or jut enough to stay in place.
Prince Albert -
Also known as a PA. A male piercing between the urethra and the
underside of the penis. Not named after the Prince of Monaco.
Puppy Play -
Perhaps the most popular of animal RPGs. Here, the submissive
actually mimics a puppy. Sometimes it can evolve into a lifestyle
where the "puppy" even sleeps in a cage.
Pushy Bottom -
Old school phrase for a very demanding bottom. Associated with
Topping from the bottom.
Pussy Torture -
The use of BDSM devices - such as clamps - on the female gential
area to produce pain.
Sex with statues or inanimate objects
- Sexual arousal from kissing butt cheeks
Quirt - A type
of buggy whip used for whipping the submissive. Easier and safer to
use than a bullwhip.
Abbreviation for Role Play Games.
Rack - Bondage
furniture patterned after the infamous torture device of the
Inquisition. The bottom is put on it and "stretched" - but not in
the extreme fatal way.
Real Life or Real
Time - r/l or r/t - as opposed to virtual or cyber life.
Red - Most
common safe word meaning stop.
Limiting the bottom's movement with the use of various bondage gear,
equipment or devices.
Limiting the bottom's behavior or physical movement.
Riding Crop -
Tongue contact with the rectum or asshole.
Ring Gag - A
device that keeps the submissive's mouth wide open. Also called a
Role Play Games
- Taking fantasy roles in BDSM scenes. For example, nurse or
Rope - The most
common of bondage equipment.
Rubber - After
leather, the most popular fetish material.
SAM - Smart
Assed Masochist. A pseudo submissive who attempts to control
everything the dominant does.
S&M - Sadism
and masochism. One who enjoy administering pain and one who enjoys
S/m - Modern
term for S & M. Also SM, S/M, SMer
Sadist - An
individual who enjoys causing pain. The term dates back to the
Marquis de Sade.
The perversion of taking pleasure, especially sexual gratification
from simultaneous sadism and masochism.
Safe, Sane and
Consensual - A popular slogan in the BDSM world meaning that
play should always be safe, with good judgment exercised. And, most
importantly, it MUST be consensual.
Safe Word - A
word or phrase a submissive can use to stop his or her scene. It is
absolute. If a Dominant disregards a submissive’s safe word, that
Dominant is considered "unsafe." The most common safe word is "RED!"
Some also use a caution word such as “Yellow” to signify that the
dominant is approaching a limit.
Cross - A popular piece of BDSM furniture where a submissive can
be conveniently tied or cuffed to it and rendered immobile. It looks
like a big cross!
Safe Sex -
Using condoms and taking all necessary health precautions during
Saran Wrap -
Brand of cling film used in mummification scenes.
Scat - Fecal
play. An abbreviation for "scatological."
Scene - A BDSM
session. Can be used to refers to "public scene" at a party where
the participants let others watch or a “private scene” where just
the dominant and submissive are present.
Role-play - Popular RPG wherein the submissive is the "bad
school girl" and the Dominant is the "teacher."
The practice of performing bondage on oneself by oneself.
Shackle - Metal
or leather bondage restraint device consisting of round cuffs joined
by a chain or bar.
Shaving - It is
very common in BDSM for submissives to shave their pubic hair.
Shoe Fetish –
One who enjoys shoes. Popular fetish, even in the vanilla world.
Rigged paddle modified to make a loud sound.
Slave - A term
used interchangeably with "submissive." Some consider a slave a more
extreme version of a submissive.
- A signed consensual contract, wherein a submissive or slave cedes
to the Dom or Master a specified set of powers over her for a set
period of time. Although legally unenforceable, it is still a
powerful document between dominant and slave
Sound - Medical
device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play. Also called
Spanking - To
slap on the buttocks with the open hand, or a short flat object such
as a paddle or a hairbrush. Used as both punishment and/or in
role-play context in BDSM scenes.
- BDSM furniture, a variation on the saw horse, onto which a
submissive is attached (by cuffs, rope, etc.) for the Dominant to
spank and play with.
Medical device intended for opening and examining the rectum or
vagina; used mostly in "doctor/medical scene" play.
- Type of wooden paddle with holes drilled though it.
Spreader Bar -
A long metal rod that holds the submissive legs, thighs or even
wrists wide apart.
- Sexual attraction to those with body modifications or tattoos
Stocks - A
piece of bondage furniture patterned after the Puritan model. The
head and hands go through holes while the submissive is standing.
Straightjacket - Confining device used mostly in psychiatric
wards to restrain the insane. It is intended to prevent the movement
of the arms and is usually impossible to remove without assistance.
see Breath Control.
Strapon - A
belt or harness that has a dildo attached. IT allows the wearer the
ability to fuck another either in the vagina or anus.
Another term for a "beating".
Sub - see
Subby - see
Subbie - see
The act of submitting to the will and desire of another, usually
within negotiated limits.
Submissive - An
individual who consents to give up power to a Dominant. This can be
for any duration - for an hour or a lifetime.
Subspace - A
state of mind and body - often like a trance - caused by endorphins
emitted during a BDSM scene.
Surface Burn -
A temporary brand, usually produced with copper wire heated less hot
than steel used in making a permanent brand.
- Temporary piercing through the skin's surface.
suspending a submissive with ropes, webbing or chain so that no part
of the body touches the floor. Not recommended for beginners.
Switch - A
person who can both Top and bottom depending on the situation and
his partner. Many switches have switches as partners.
24/7 - A 24
hours a day, 7 days a week. At all times.
TENS Unit -
Acronym for Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation unit. Used
for sexual stimulation is electrical play scenes. See also Violet
TPE - Total
Power Exchange; term reserved for established 24/7 Master/slave
TT - Tit
- Piercing the body temporarily. All piercings are removed at
the end of the session. Same as play piercing.
Thermolysis - A
form of electrical hair removal.
Thong Whip – A
whip made of thing strands of either leather or rubber. When swing
lightly it will not cause much pain, when swung hard it can cause
Sexual arousal from wealth, yet another thing most females have even
if the wont admit to it.
Top - A
Dominant, the person who is in charge or has control.
Topping from the
bottom - This is where a submissive dictates the action in a
scene, something that is highly frowned upon. Can also be used in
real time context. When a submissive becomes too demanding.
Torture - term
meaning to cause pain.
Toy, BDSM - Any
piece of equipment used in a BDSM scene.
Piercing through the ridge on the face side of the ear hole.
Not quite male, not quite female.
– incorporating manners, behaviors, appearance, etc of the opposite
sex while still maintaining some of the above of your biological
Tweezer Nipple Clamps - A style of nipple
clamp that is like a pair of tweezers with a ring around the
outside. As you push the ring toward the pincher ends, it causes the
clamp to tighten or bite harder.
Urethral Play -
Play involving the urethra, the tube that runs between the bladder
and the outside of the body. Not for beginners.
- Medical device to be inserted into the urethra in medical play.
Sexual excitement from urine or the act of urination
- Using the suction of a vacuum to increase the size of body parts.
Sexual arousal caused by drinking blood
People not in the BDSM or Fetish lifestyle. Most people, whether
admitted or not have some sort of fetish.
Violet Wand -
An electric device usually in form of a glass cylinder, which uses
the effect of high frequency electric charges to apply intense
Virtual life or
Virtual Time - v/l or v/t - often used to describe "online life"
as opposed to r/l (real life).
WS - see Water
Water Sports -
The sexual enjoyment of urine play. Also called Golden Showers (or
- A medical pinwheel that is commonly used in BDSM play to
stimulate or cause a feeling sensation.
Wax Play - Play
in which the Dominant brings hot wax on the submissive's skin.
Web - A bondage
device, popular in many dungeons, created with ropes that are spun
like a spider's web.
Weights - Used
to stretch body parts such as nipples and labia; usually attached to
clamps or piercings.
Whip - Usually
made of leather with a medium size handle and long braided leather
Whipping Post -
In olden times, a post to which offenders were fastened for
whippings. Reproductions are sometimes used in BDSM dungeons.
Sexual arousal from jealousy